Another September, another school year is underway, Mash’Allah. At Haute Hijab, we have HH kiddos in a variety of elementary school grades, and then there’s my youngest kid, who has begun 10th grade of his high school years. It’s just zipping along here!

We just finished a month of Haute Hijab Academy content, bringing you stories and a special series on “Building Confidence” in all stages of life to help you get ready for this season of fall, of back-to-school and returning to the routines and work of our lives after a more (hopefully) loose and carefree (or at least less cares) summer time.

It’s hard to get back in that mindset when many of us are still enjoying the warmth of lingering summer and the still long-ish days. A 

 from Melissa Kirsch summed up this mixed-bag of feelings:

“Why must there be such an austere demarcation between before Labor Day and after, between summer and not-summer, between enjoying our lives and enduring them? Why have we so internalized the back-to-school dread of childhood that it’s become a permanent feature of adulthood.

I know there are people (many of them! and so vocal!) who enjoy the ramrod posture of fall, who find the post-Labor Day realignment invigorating. … But let’s ease into it.

I challenge you, this year, to own every last day until the equinox (Sept. 23 at 2:49 a.m. Eastern in the Northern Hemisphere). Sure, the first day of school has come and gone, the vacation people have returned from their vacationing, rested and restive, muttering about Q4 and getting a jump start on Christmas shopping. But there are still three weeks left of summer, plenty of time both for nimbu pani and pumpkin spice alike. Plenty of time to integrate your summer self 

 into the incipient and inevitable enterprise of fall.”

That really spoke to our hearts, this easing into the “inevitable enterprise of fall.” Because to be sure, lots of us (myself included) really love the refocus that fall brings (along with cooler temps, changing autumn colors and all the stereotypical stuff that comes along with it). But it’s nice to allow ourselves to ease back into it, even though Labor Day weekend often feels like this last line in the sand between summer and fall.

With that in mind, we don’t have a clear theme or focus this month on the blog. We are allowing ourselves the time to explore stories and what's happening in our communities of Muslim women, to regroup and refocus after taking a beat and listening to what is happening with you, to you.

We DO have some things planned, including a look back at how we’ve changed as communities and as individuals in this third year after the COVID-19 global pandemic changed life as we knew it (for most of us). We also will be exploring the concept of 

, and how “back-to-school” isn’t just for kids; we all should be in a constant state of learning.

Plus, we will be exploring what judging other people really says about ourselves - if there is something that is truly bothering you about someone else that really isn’t 

or morally wrong, maybe it’s an invitation to explore oneself and one’s own biases. (Bringing back our favorite, anonymous middle-aged Muslimah writer who wrote 

Also, remember I hinted last month that we’re getting ready to drop a big thing for you? Ok, I’m not a tease, it really is happening, 

, in the next few weeks as we dot all our “i’s” and cross our “t’s.” And I’m SO EXCITED for it, but can’t say more than that.

So, what are you excited for in the coming months? What are you easing into (or out of)? Let us know! Insha’Allah we will all close out 2023 with grace and good humor and an eye on all the beautiful things there are to fight for and to come. As always, be good, make good choices and always start with 

From the Editor's Desk – Taking a Beat for Deep Thinking While We Examine Hidden Biases

At a meeting this week, we were looking at this phrase on our calendar where we keep track of all our different projects and work, and it said, “It’s still summer, dammit!” We all sat confused for a minute, trying to figure out what that meant, what it was referring to.

Our Marketing Manager Noor had dropped that in there as a reminder that although everyone seems to start talking “back to school” as SOON as August hits (if not earlier), it is still summer, and let’s not rush into the next season of our lives! We all felt her hard. No one wants to let summertime magic be rushed out the door. However …

It is August, and in many places around the U.S. and world, school is starting this month. It just can’t be ignored, haha! At my house, my youngest is the only one left in school, and he was remarking at dinner time how many weeks he has left until the 10th grade grind begins. (Three. He has three weeks left.) So yeah, as much as we want to hold on to summer, school and fall is fast approaching. And this means one very special thing around Haute Hijab – HH Academy is back!

We debuted HH Academy last year at The Haute Take and across all our platforms, bringing you content, products and giveaways to help you get ready for back-to-school and fall season. Whether you are headed back to school or have a loved one who is, OR even if you’re not – this time of year hits with all of us as that time to get our stuff straightened out, get organized and get ready for a recommitment to our work, goals, projects, school, home, or whatever is important to you.

And so, HH Academy is back in August to help you get ready for school and whatever else you want to get ready for! We’ve got an HH school supply list coming at you (with all the hijabs and products you need to be able to get your hijab on and styled quickly and have the best of hijab days) as well as other prep pieces to help you build confidence, get organized and renew your intentions for the best of outcomes in all your activities and endeavors.

As much as we may want to delay it, it's back to school season! Image source: Pexels.

This month on the blog we’re bringing you a special series focusing on building confidence across all stages of life as part of our body of work at HH Academy. We want to understand what are the deterrents in your life to feeling confident in yourself and how you build confidence at various stages in life. We hope to hear stories from young women still in school or college, women in earlier stages of adult life, women in middle and later acts of life and so on.

In doing so, we hope to gain a better understanding about what blocks our self confidence, what helps us build it, and how we rely on it in healthy ways to pursue our goals.

This all ties into the growing body of work we are developing for you at HH Academy, a sort of library of knowledge, support and educational content around all aspects of a Muslim woman’s life, including her relationship with her hijab.

Also, stay tuned for more of Melanie through “Mondays with Melanie” emails that are in the works and her new broadcast channel on Instagram, where she is sharing her musings and thoughts and engaging with you on various aspects of faith, fashion, lifestyle and current events. And, we’ve got a very special thing we are getting closer to launching to further help you build your hijab confidence and style game!

So, stick around and check out what’s going on at The Haute Take this month and across Haute Hijab at large! As always, keep us in your 

, as you are in ours! Take care, make good decisions and always start with 

From the Editor's Desk – It's HH Academy Time, and We're Talking About Building Confidence!

We've reached the middle month of summer, and I feel like I have packed in an entire summer’s worth of activities into a few short weeks. At our house, we like to pace our activities (with our autism living and all), but it has been go, go, go around here! There have been weddings, the end of school, a beach trip and Eid ul Adha already.

How about you? Is your summer off to a bang with a frenzy of activities? Or, is it a meandering, relaxed summer? I like both kinds, but lean more towards the lazy, relaxed summer with a smattering of activities. This is the first summer in our home when one of our kids is leaving the nest for a major flight for the rest of summer. Our daughter is headed to a study abroad program this week, which is a major shift in our family dynamic.

I grew up with the most fantastic set of parents as a first-generation Muslim American. My folks were literally pioneers in figuring out how to straddle American living with our Islamic deen in a way that always prioritized our lives as Muslim but also had us threading ourselves into the American fabric in ways that didn’t compromise our beliefs and values. That was the goal, at least, and I think my folks did a pretty good job of it.

They were figuring things out, and part of their parenting technique was restricting my brothers and I, particularly me (as a daughter), from leaving the safety and stability of home for other adventures. I commuted to college and never did study abroad or took an internship that would have me moving out of the home.

I knew I would do some things differently with my children. Hence when our daughter presented us with a study abroad program and her reasons for wanting to go, her dad and I agreed and offered full support.

Yeah, I’m plenty nervous and will be popping overseas to visit her at the midway point of her studies (What? Don’t judge me! She asked me to come!), but 

Our new summer chiffon colors have dropped, 13 of them! I am really digging this shade, 

So that’ll be my July! How about you, HH fam? What do you have going on? This month at Haute Hijab we are focusing on the theory of color – how understanding what colors work for you, your skin tone and your changing moods can help you pick the right ones to wear and with which to surround yourself.

, and this month we’ll be getting into the subtle differences between shades of blue, purples pinks and more. We’re always being asked (well, Melanie most of all is being asked) –will this hijab color look good on me? What hijab color looks good on me? As we explore color throughout the month, we hope to help you answer these questions!

The Islamic month of Muharram will begin soon, and towards the end of July will be Ashura, an important date in Islamic history for us all as well as an important remembrance for Shi’a Muslims. We will be featuring some stories around that as well. While we don’t want to put the burden of educating Muslims about Ashura on our Shi’a fam, we do hope to learn more from them about why this day is particularly significant to them.

And get ready, we’re working on something special to bring you in August (or thereabouts), Insha’Allah! I won’t say more, but we hope it will be the start of something helpful and wonderful for the beautiful women and communities we serve! So, keep us and our work in your du’as, as you are in ours. And as always, start everything you do with 

From the Editor's Desk – Exploring the Theory of Color & Learning About Ashura

I recently celebrated a birthday. (And no, I won’t tell you how old I am, but I have adult-ish children, so that should say something :) My kids were asking me what I wanted, and as Allah (S) has blessed me with a lot and as the things I truly want in life can’t be bought or made (COVID to permanently end, those who are oppressed to receive justice, my mom-in-law’s chronic pain to diminish, my parents to enjoy good health, my autistic son’s future to be protected and guaranteed, my children to be steadfast on 

), I sat on their question for a long time.

I mean, I don’t need a purse or a new ring to wear. What I do need is to work on my own health and well being to give myself the best chance at a long, healthy, active, mobile life (knowing I will need this to help support my son as he continues his adult path).

I don’t know about you, but I was an avid bike rider as a kid. It’s all we ever did, with no internet, cell phones or other devices to entertain us. I read books, watched cartoons, drew pictures and rode bikes with the kids in the neighborhood. There was a geographical range my brothers and I knew we were to stay within, and we just cruised around, riding one-handed, no-handed, popping wheelies and having occasional neighborhood bike races.

I had been wanting to get a bike for a few years. My husband got one several years ago, and he and our youngest son mapped out a 5K route in our neighborhoods that they often bike. I wanted in. But I was also in my head about it. As my husband and I discussed bikes, we got tripped up by what kind and what we wanted to do with our bikes. Racing? Off roading? Long rides? Did we want to be serious cyclists?

This year I finally said – just get me a bike. I showed the family a bike available at Costco – you know, your basic bike – and said just get that or something like it. All I want to do is ride around whenever I want to.

 So now I get to go bike riding, and the old saying is totally true: Once you learn how, you don’t forget. But also my body feels a bit more shaky and hesitant; I’m not as freewheeling and easygoing. However, that’s par for the course. The point is I got out of my head and just got on the damn bike!

This is all part of this path I’m trying to push myself on, in which I stop thinking about what it’s going to take for me to feel better (whether physically or mentally) and take that step and try something. Because if that something isn’t working for me (and my family), I’ll stop it and try something else. This is what got me to sign on with a lovely local Muslimah fitness instructor, with whom I’ve now been doing fitness and strength training classes thrice weekly since January – I think it’s the longest stretch I’ve consistently exercised in YEARS. (I even did modified exercise in Ramadan. Like wow! Who am I?)

The point is, I hope for you all what I hope for ourselves: That we get out of our heads, that we value our own health, that we do something about it. This month, we’ll be focusing on two things at The Haute Take and at Haute Hijab in general: Our physical well being and our spiritual well being. The first half on the blog will be (

) dedicated to health and fitness coverage while the second half focuses on the first ten holy days of Dhul Hijjah in the lead up to Hajj and Eid ul Adha.

Our strength as Muslim women lies in our own ability to prioritize our spiritual, mental and physical health. If we don’t do it, no one will do it for us. All of us at Haute Hijab believe this and believe in you, our communities of fabulous Muslim women. It’s why we invested years of 

, to give you the tools to be able to work out and be physically fit with ease and comfort. (And style!)

So, join us this month in exploring our physical and spiritual health, fitness and well being. Prioritize it for yourselves, and if you fall off the wagon, don’t worry too much. We can all get on again multiple times and keep trying. As all ways, be well, make good choices and always start with Bismillah!

From the Editor's Desk – Prioritizing Our Physical & Spiritual Health and Well Being

 Ramadan is over, and the majority of the Muslim ummah is sad over the end of the fasting month and the intense ibadah (worship) so many of us focused on.

 Now that Ramadan is done, wedding season is officially here, and with that comes Haute Hijab’s second annual Wedding Week this May! (Well, it’s actually two weeks this year, but we’re continuing to call it HH Wedding Week.)

I look forward to this yearly because this tradition began on the blog three years ago when my writers’ team and I thought (based on observing the things you like to read) that it would be good to do a “Wedding Month,” where we focused our content and stories on all things pertaining to marriage, relationships, weddings, divorce, families, blended families and, of course, weddings. That year (2021) The Haute Take hosted Wedding Month in July between Eid ul Fitr (at the end of Ramadan) and Eid ul Adha (in Dhul Hijjah).

We had so much fun and you all responded so positively to our stories and content that we decided HH had to go all-in on Wedding Week!

We have so much in store for you this May with Wedding Week, starting with a carefully curated collection page of 

beautiful “special occasion” hijabs and foundational products

 to wear as a bride, a member of a bridal party or if you’re attending weddings this spring and summer! One of the things our fashion writer Hakeemah covered in last year’s HH Wedding Week was all the hijabs, products and tips you need to have 

We have some fun things planned for you on social as well an abundance of stories and content geared towards all aspects of the wedding process – from bride-focused content to wedding color trends for 2023 to bridesmaid tips on how to best support a bride to wedding night advice (yes, you read that right) to a few crowdsourced articles from married women and recent brides to those who are embarking on this new and beautiful chapter in life.

As someone who’s foot is firmly planted in Generation X and someone who is mother to three adult-approaching and adult-ish Gen Z’ers, witnessing how weddings, courtship, relationships and marriages are unfolding now for my nieces, nephews, children of friends and someday (

) my own children has been an eye opening experience of letting go of past traditions that deserve to be left behind mixed with the carrying forward of advice and things that are timeless and steeped in the wisdom of our faith.

I waiver between worry – over if these young adults truly appreciate the beauty and hard work of compromise in a marriage – and hope and pride that they have a way better sense of self than those of my generation ever did. A firm sense of self and what matters to you in building a marriage with someone – as well as understanding where and how much you’re willing to compromise and sacrifice for the sake of the life you are building together – is so important.

But look at me! As my HH team members and friends say, I’m talking in “aunty mode!” And so what if I am? Some people embrace their villain era; I’m embracing my aunty era! One of the things my friends and I talk about is being the elder aunties and confidants to our daughters and other young women that we desired when we were young. Be the aunties we wanted in our lives when we were young!

With that being said, I hope you enjoy HH’s Wedding Week coming up this month! If you’re getting married soon, we pray your marriage (and wedding) is a blessed and beautiful one. If you hope to get married, we pray the right spouse will come to you, someone who straddles the best of 

As always, make good choices, and start everything with 

Bridal and Special Occasion collection page here

, and check back later this month to see what else we'll be adding to this page!

From the Editor's Desk – And They Lived Happily Ever After; It's Time for HH Wedding Week!

This Ramadan, Haute Hijab is continuing its partnership with Islamic Relief USA to help support earthquake relief efforts in Turkey and Syria. This article is the second in a three-part series focused on this longer-term relief work, the stories of survivors and what it takes for an organization like IRUSA to plan out and execute long-ranging relief projects. Read the first part 

. Please reap the rewards of supporting work like this in Ramadan and 

The sounds and noise of the earthquakes was absolutely indescribable and terrifying, the trauma of which lives on in Turkish and Syrian earthquake survivors. This is what Islamic Relief aid workers have reported time and time again from their work in the field.

IRUSA’s CEO Sharif Aly remembers “[one of the organization’s directors based in Turkey] telling us that when the earthquake happened, the thing that people remembered the most was the sound. The sound was so loud – they said it sounded like rocks screaming. They believed it was Y

Long after the earth stopped shaking and rubble was cleared from the thousands of fallen buildings, the trauma lingers on.

Nearly two months after two massive earthquakes devastated Turkey and Syria, the hard work of rebuilding lives and infrastructure is being planned out and starting. The road for thousands upon thousands of Turkish and Syrian people is fraught with uncertainty and instability, and organizations like IRUSA are settling in for the long haul in earthquake relief projects, one of which is to address the trauma survivors continue to endure.

Mental Health Psychosocial Support (MHPSS) is a huge long-term need in earthquake-stricken areas in Turkey and Syria, one that likely will be addressed by the Turkish government with support (as needed) from NGOs in the region. I spoke with an IRUSA program manager to learn more about why addressing mental health needs is so important, how projects are assessed and why the need for continued donations and support continues to be immensely important and needed as relief efforts move forward.

MHPSS is so important for survivors to begin to put their lives back together, says the IRUSA program manager. “You have psychological trauma. You have trauma from being trapped under a building, from losing family members, from the ground literally becoming unstable under your feet.”

While IRUSA is currently focused on providing physical needs for survivors, mental health support is needed in the long term, and IRUSA is exploring how to support these efforts as they are determined and undertaken by the Turkish government, she says. “There are different therapies that have been effective at reducing symptoms of PTSD and challenges of that sort of trauma,” the program manager explains, and numerous things are needed to implement a variety of therapies to address these traumas. “We’re still so close to when the earthquakes happened – it’s all still coming together.” For example, trained therapists who speak Turkish and Arabic will be needed, she explains.

In addition, different approaches to therapy will be needed, as trauma manifests differently between children and adults, resulting in the need for things like recreational activities for kids and art therapy. The other important aspect of MHPSS is finding professionals on the ground – local people.

A critical part of mental health support is figuring out how to help parents deal with their kids’ fears while also regulating their own. “Parents need to be able to regulate themselves so they can help regulate their children,” says the program manager.

More than 2.5 million people are displaced in Turkey and Syria.

Two major long-term projects IRUSA is working on are housing and livelihood programs, says Br. Sharif. “People need a dignified home to have stability.” Because the government in Turkey is different than in Syria and because Syria has been long-ravaged by civil war, the challenges for these projects will be different. “In Syria NGO structures will be doing a big part of rebuilding homes. In Turkey, some elements will be NGO-led and others will be Turkish-government led.”

There will also be a concerted effort to rebuild the local economy and infrastructures to help boost the livelihoods of people, “because what are these people going to do? What about schools? Where will teachers work? There has to be a concerted effort to rebuild the local economy, and NGOs play a part in that,” says Br. Sharif.

The organization will initially be focusing on cash assistance for affected families through July and then on livelihood activities in areas like agriculture and livestock as well as support to smal and medium enterprises (SMEs).

IRUSA has been active in Gaziantep and Kahramanmaras as well as Kilis, Asekale, Osmaniye and Sanilurfa. Thus far, Islamic Relief, as a whole, has distributed food packages to more than 37,000 households and more than 174,000 people. These food packages consist of rice, bulgur, sugar, olive oil and tomato paste as well as ready-to-eat food items like water, cakes, juice and dates. These were largely provided in the immediate aftermath along with blankets, food vouchers and hygiene kits, says the IRUSA program manager.

“Our teams have been working tirelessly,” she says. “I don’t think they’ve stopped. We’ve had reports of staff sleeping in cars in the initial response.”

As things have started to calm down from the frenzy of the initial response, IRUSA staff on the ground are looking into housing and water solutions as well as livelihood intervention. They (along with other NGOs) are working with AFAD, the Disaster and Emergency Management Authority, in Turkey, to conduct assessments for what the needs are as they move past initial disaster relief work into longer-term projects.

Melanie visiting with children in Turkey in the aftermath of the earthquakes; image source: Imam Khalid Latif.

“Long after the cameras have left and the international media moves on to the next story, the overwhelming need to help the people of Turkiye and Syria will still exist,” says HH’s CEO Melanie Elturk, who traveled with an IRUSA team to Turkey in the immediate aftermath to raise awareness and donations.

“And sadly, the donations to help rebuild will slow down significantly. It's important to remember this earthquake hit an already devastated and war-torn area of the world so the need is even more critical than we can imagine. I'll never forget meeting kids who thought the earthquake was just a routine air strike they've become accustomed to. It's hard to imagine what they've endured but one thing is for sure – they need our help."

As we settle into the second 10 days of Ramadan, we urge you to remember the people of Turkey and Syria in your du’as, and we 

 to help with these longer-term relief efforts. Near the end of the month, we’ll look at some of the behind-the-scenes immense intricacies and responsibilities of how IRUSA does this work, the success of which depends in large part on 

Let’s not forget the losses endured by the earthquake survivors in Turkey and Syria this Ramadan. They need our support now more than ever.

From Trauma Support to Rebuilding Lives & Homes, Turkey/Syria Earthquake Relief Efforts Continue

prayers of 2023, which is always a sort of small miracle for me. We (along with a group of families), host iftar at our masjid one night of Ramadan, and last night was our night. So, I got my son’s caregiver on board (he’s autistic and needs caregiving support) to come for the evening, and the rest of us headed to the masjid.

Most of my Ramadan nights are spent at home with my son. I don’t see the point of hiring a nightly caregiver to be with him just so I can go to tarawih (

), and I know that the care and support I give him and the rest of my family is also part of of my 

For those of us pulled in many directions this holy month – between our responsibilities towards our children, elders, family, work, volunteer work and otherwise – what we do each Ramadan is another step in our growing relationship with Allah (S) and our surrounding communities. I spent so many Ramadans in strife and turmoil through challenging years for my son, which subsequently brought me to a place of beseeching, constant questioning and difficulties trusting in Allah’s (S) process.

And then it all kind of settled. My heart settled (it’s not at peace, but it’s definitely more peaceful), life settled, my husband and my push-pull tensions as we tried to navigate Ramadan settled. And, it’s not that things got easier; it’s that we – through years of striving, struggles and hard work – became more trusting and content in Allah’s (S) will and plan for our son and our family.

Well, that’s how I feel this year, Alhamdullilah. I find this to be a Ramadan of letting go of expectations and welcoming of whatever is, whatever paths we are on to grow closer to Allah (S) and enjoin good for His sake. These are the perpetuating themes we are all experiencing here at HH and as a team, topics we are exploring with you through our blog posts and our annual Ramadan Haute Hijab halaqas.

Melanie's hosting our HH halaqas again on Instagram this Ramadan!

Were you able to watch/listen to Melanie’s halaqa with

 (“Making the Most of Ramadan, No Matter What Your State”) and the one with 

 (“Trusting Allah (S) When All Doors Seem to be Closing & the Weight Feels Unbearable”). The latter especially hit me in my feels, as this has been a nearly two-decades and counting struggle for me. There are two more to come, featuring 

These halaqas are a balm for our souls and such beautiful motivation to continue to strengthen our relationship with Allah (S). We hope you benefit from them!

On The Haute Take this month, we’re continuing our Ramadan coverage with the second and third part of our series focused on charity work and our 

partnership with IRUSA to support continuing earthquake relief efforts in Turkey and Syria

. Often after a natural disaster occurs, attention and donations wane as the weeks pass. But that’s when relief efforts move past immediate response to mid- and long-term projects that focus on the work of rebuilding lives through sustainable measures. This is when support is needed more than ever. We will be sharing how these efforts are unfolding as well as some behind-the-scenes stories of what it takes for a charity organization like IRUSA to do this work on a long-term basis.

And, in continuing efforts to bring you stories about how we can perform various parts of our faith at home (as it can be difficult to get to the masjid at times), we’ll be bringing you stories about how to do qiyam and qiyam-ul-layl at home and how to make du’a. So many of us get muddled up in our thoughts sometimes and feel like we don’t properly know how to make du’a or how to make heartfelt du’as that reach Allah (S).

 (password: samosa), to shop beautiful, limited-edition hijabs, including ones that had previously sold out. You’ll never know what you’ll find in the Ramadan Vault! Check out our 

We pray, as we enter the second ten days of Ramadan, that your fasting and ibadah are going smoothly, that you are able to let go of whatever it is you can let go of to focus more on your connection with Allah (S) and streamline your life in ways that can be continued beyond this fasting month.

As always, keep us in your du’as. You are in ours. And start anything you do with 

From the Editor's Desk – Where We Let Go of Expectations in Ramadan & Trust in Allah (S)

I’m not a “good Muslim." I feel like I lack in a lot of things when it comes to the faith practices of Islam. Can Ramadan be for me?

We often hear this question leading up to or during Ramadan, when Muslims around the world fast for 30 days and take part in extra communal and individual worship. If you feel distant from religion or Allah (S), you may find Ramadan intimidating or out of reach, and that’s totally understandable. Especially with social media, it may seem like everyone is doing the most and it might feel like unless you are like them, you’re not “good enough” for Ramadan. So then, why even try, right?

, you couldn’t be farther from the truth.

Ramadan is for everyone. Islam is for everyone. And having a relationship with Allah (S) is for everyone.

, Allah (S) always wants you to return to Him in repentance and build a connection with Him…and what better time to do this than during Ramadan, 

. In fact, so long as you are living and breathing, there is always a chance to return to Allah (S). The Prophet (S) said, 

“Allah accepts the repentance of His servant so long as death has not reached his collar bone.”

(the devil) is actually to convince you that you are so far gone, it is pointless to return to Allah (S). That because you haven’t been close to Allah (S) or perhaps practicing of Islam outside of Ramadan, Ramadan therefore isn’t for you. Don’t give him that power over you. The believer doesn’t despair of Allah (S)’s love and mercy. Consider this:

Yā Muqallibal-qulūb, thabbit qalbī `alā dīnik

“O Changer of the hearts, make my heart firm upon Your religion”

 most uttered by our Prophet Muhammad (saw). Reflect on that for a few moments. If the Prophet – who was as close to perfection as a human can get – was consistently praying to God during Ramadan to keep his heart steadfast, what does that tell you about the nature of the human’s heart? It tells me:

The human heart needs God in the past, present and future.

And that means everyone. Even the Prophet. You are not alone. It is normal for our faith to go up and down in phases – the key is to solidify your faith so that even when it is down, you maintain your obligatory acts of worship (like prayer).

1. Reaffirm your faith in Allah (S), then repent to Him for your misdeeds.

In a hadith Qudsi, Allah, the Exalted, said:

One of the mercies of Allah (S) is that once someone repents from a sin, it is completely wiped from his slate. You start anew. And when someone commits a good deed, it is recorded and multiplied. (And then multiplied again by 70 times during Ramadan!!) So if you feel like you’ve not been close to your faith or a “bad Muslim” (whatever that means), Ramadan is still for you. Seek forgiveness and embrace the barakah (blessings) of the month.

First off, do not compare yourself to others. Everyone’s journey to God is unique, and everyone’s faith ebbs and flows. If needed, get off social media while you focus on yourself. Where are YOU? Are you performing obligatory worships, like praying five times a day and fasting? If not, start there, and once you become consistent, build upon that. 

If you’re not praying at all, make one prayer regular. Then add one more, and one more until you reach five. If you pray and that’s it, try adding something else. Maybe pray the 

. Make du’a more. Maybe attend tarawih at the masjid (or 

). Try reading from the Quran – start with as little as a page a day, even if you must read from the translation. The goal is 

, not overburdening yourself trying to do ALL the things.

Allah (S) will make it easy for you. In another hadith Qudsi, Allah (S) said:

Allah’s (S) mercy is so vast that He just wants you to turn to Him, and He will open the doors for you and make it so easy for you, inshallah. It starts with you, your heart and your intention (

3. Build a connection with Allah (S) by making constant du’a.

Speak to Allah (S). If you find that your words can’t flow, try making a du’a list or keep a journal as a guide for what to say when you are making du’a. Remember, there is no gatekeeper between you and Allah (S). You can speak to Him at any time of day. Are some times better for making du’a than others? Sure, and you can learn more about 

 Ramadan is special in the sense that everything is more blessed, spirituality more heightened, and du’a opportunities are vast.

Seek Him, seek His help in getting closer to Him, repent to Him, tell Him everything, and He will answer you, Insha’Allah. Ask him to put His blessings in your journey back to Him, and He will not turn you away.

Thank Him for all the blessings He has put in your life. Reflect on God’s blessings in your life. Sometimes, you need to name them to remember them. Thank Him, and ask Him for more.

of Ramadan is so huge, that anyone who seeks Allah (S) will reap infinite rewards and, Insha’Allah, be able to get back on track. The mercy, forgiveness and barakah that comes from Allah (S) is more immense that you can imagine. Take advantage of that, and use this time to get closer to Him.

Trust me, this will change your life. Knowing who your creator is – how loving and merciful He is, how perfect and just He is, how much He loves YOU – will make an immense difference in your faith and how you worship Him. I would start by learning about His 99 names. 

Remember, there is no gatekeeper to Ramadan, and certainly no gatekeeper to Allah (S). So long as you are living and breathing, you will always have a direct line to God. Both Ramadan and life are a marathon, not a sprint. We are all at different levels of faith, and these levels fluctuate year by year. Just keep coming back to Allah, and increase your 

and consciousness of Him, one step at a time. We’re all rooting for you, and Allah (S) is waiting for you.

May Allah open our hearts to Him and help us use Ramadan to get closer to Him, and stronger in faith. May He accept all our efforts, purify our hearts, forgive all our sins and keep us steadfast on His path always. Ameen.

Ramadan Mubarak, friend. Ramadan is for YOU, in whatever state you come to it. The blessings are there for the taking.

With love, Noor Suleiman on behalf of the HH team

Ask Haute Hijab: I'm a 'Bad Muslim,' is Ramadan for Me? In a Word – Yes

It’s 2020, and we are experiencing the first wave of the pandemic when the doors of all non-essential businesses are closed. Ramadan is here, an increased time of giving when most Muslim-led nonprofits receive a majority of their funding for the year. However, there is nowhere to physically go and fundraise. 

A national advocacy and service organization based in Chicago strategizes on how to make the most of this unique situation. Through a myriad of innovative organizing and physically distant methods, this group meets its fundraising goal well before the close of the month of Ramadan. After feeling overcome with relief and gratitude, this organization decides to give back. They elevate four other non-profits, who are also seeking to meet their fundraising goals, on their email list, imploring their constituents to learn about them and consider donating. 

 impressed me for the way in which Ramadan connected to giving and concepts of abundance.

The 2023 spring season marks a time when multiple faith traditions celebrate significant holidays. Jews retell the story of the Exodus while sharing in 

during Passover, and brightly colored eggs are shared for Easter (

). For Muslims, the faithful join a global cadence of worship engaging in fasting during daylight hours and spending nights in worship and community in the month of Ramadan.

In the converging of holidays, I’m reminded of how “Fasting is prescribed for you as it was prescribed to those before you.” [Quran 2:183] And, as I assess the contents of our fridge, I am bewildered by the food we are amassing as the fasts begin. How did this happen when we are fasting from food and drink for 13.5 hours a day (where I live)? Did I really buy that much hummus?

Aside from an abundant fridge, abstaining from food and drink is an equalizing moment. In the beginning of Ramadan, I am often immobilized by feelings of hunger, fatigue and insecurity. Regardless of socioeconomic status, healthy Muslims are prohibited from reaching for the glass of water when our mouths run dry with thirst. At the same time, this connection with the under-nourished opens up an awareness. 

 after a massive earthquake flashes on the news, my heart opens to share resources in a genuine way. Through the course of the month, I find that I have built patience, fortitude and resiliency. This higher level of consciousness builds the awareness that, through a triangular relationship with God and people, giving sincerely to others means that God, the Most Generous, will provide me even more in return.

As in the opening story, when we believe there is enough funds for my cause and there is enough for others as well, we can find ways to uplift each other’s efforts without feeling threatened by competition.

Abundance Giving in Forms of Sadaqa and Zakat

As I write this article, I receive a call from a friend of a friend who is looking to donate grocery money to newly arrived Afghan refugees. The increased rewards in this month inspires her to give abundantly. Her request could relate to voluntary (

Muslims with means are required to contribute 2.5 percent of savings towards zakat annually. 

is considered a right of the poor, and in engaging in this redistribution of wealth with the example of grocery money, we can discern that there will be reward for sponsoring multiple meals for a family, providing a dignified means for subsistence, a reward for the sincerity of the giver and possibly prayers of gratitude from the recipient.

One act of giving can lead to a multiplied return. In total, this annual giving practice accumulated to $1.8 billion in 2021 (Muslim American Zakat Giving Report 2022).

In the front foyer of our home, we have a colorfully decorated mason jar atop our console table with the word “Sadaqa” written across it. This jar reminds even the youngest member of our household that we can choose to set money aside at any time for the benefit of others. Sadaqa has flexibility and Muslims give this form of charity to a variety of causes. 

(In this month of Ramadan, Haute Hijab is continuing its partnership with IRUSA to support earthquake relief efforts in Turkey and Syria. Click 

The estimated amount of charity given by Muslim Americans in 2021 is 4.5 billion (Muslim American Giving Report 2021). In fact, according to the Muslim Giving Report 2021, Muslims give more than the general population by 38 percent, which means that this can also be an important time for non-faith-based nonprofits.

Although this is an impressive amount for a minority community, it’s not the only way 

is exercised. During Ramadan, I sit with my five- and seven-year-old to reflect on the day. We use strips of colorful paper to write down their meritorious acts and turn them into a paper chain to see their good deeds grow. On one particular day, my son recounts how a joke of his had made me laugh and warmed me.“ Remember, “he says “the Prophet Muhammad (S) said that smile is a charity.” 

I ask him how it makes him feel. He answers, “My heart feels good.” From a young age, he understands that giving is about connecting and uplifting others, just like the organization in the opening story.“ Compared with the general population, Muslims are significantly more likely to include smiling, good intentions, helping relatives, commanding right actions, furthering good, not causing harm to others, and advocating for the oppressed as acts of philanthropy.”[Muslim American Zakat Giving Report 2022]

How Abundance Thinking Can Transform Our Charitable Giving

Through fasting in the month of Ramadan, the experience provides a way to be introspective where a strengthened relationship with God leads to a sincere and deep connection with wanting to benefit humanity, which in turn, benefits the giver who is part of humanity. A natural outcome of this priming is to seek ways to build positive social connections through acts of zakat and sadaqa. Thinking strategically about abundant thinking can transform organizational impact.

As the Program Manager for the Community Collaboration Initiative (CCI), our team supported 21 Muslim-led nonprofit organizations on ways to collaborate with each other. With organizations overstretched in solving a large set of problems with a minimal set of resources, this environment creates an urgency that does not leave time for broader experimentation. 

Collaborations build upon the concept of brotherhood in the Muslim faith. In a well-known saying of the Prophet Muhammad (saw), “None of you will have faith till he wishes for his brother what he likes for himself." [Bukhari] This builds upon the idea of removing competitiveness and embracing positivity, collaboration and genuine affection for each other. 

When the organization in the opening story shared its platform for others to raise funds, it exemplified how they see parallel efforts as the same body of work. In another example, a CCI organization instinctively applied for a grant on behalf of their collaboration. They were awarded the grant and shared the proceeds. In both of these examples, an abundance approach was realized. Abundance is further supported through the work of collaboratively applying for the Muslim Collaboration Prizes, a pooled fund established to award funds for CCI’s 2022 collaborative projects.

Fasting is an act of Muslims engaging in self-work, building moral fortitude, patience and compassion in community with family, friends and congregations. The act of giving zakat and sadaqa creates a necessary inter-relationship between humanity, connecting through the transfer of wealth and other acts of kindnesses. Both fasting and giving are tools to build oneself to collaborate with others on building a better society. When we make space for others, we welcome the opportunity to build something greater than ourselves.

The Community Collaboration Initiative is an action-based research project from 2019-2022, finding ways for Muslim-led nonprofits to collaborate with each other. To learn more about the Community Collaboration Initiative, 

 for the Lake Institute on Faith & Giving in April 2022.

The More We Give, the Better We All Are – On Ramadan Giving and Abundance Thinking

 This Ramadan, Haute Hijab is continuing its partnership with Islamic Relief USA to help support earthquake relief efforts in Turkey and Syria. This article is the first in a three-part series focused on this longer-term relief work, the stories of survivors and what it takes for an organization like IRUSA to plan out and execute long-ranging relief projects. Please reap the rewards of supporting work like this in Ramadan and 

It’s been a little over a month since two massive earthquakes devastated parts of Turkey and Syria – a little over a month since our own Melanie 

traveled with a team from Islamic Relief USA (IRUSA) to bear witness

 to the destruction on the ground and the immense needs of the Turkish and Syrian survivors of the earthquakes while raising awareness and donations.

is around 50,000 while about two million have been displaced

 and are living in temporary housing, a number that’s hard to even fathom. We are often compelled in the wake of terrible natural disasters to give of our money and of ourselves to help those in need. The desperation in the hours, days and immediate weeks following these events is palpable, and as an ummah we can almost physically feel the pain, overwhelming sadness and hurt ourselves.

But the reality is that as time passes, our urgency to help can also unfortunately fade a bit.

Often, for those of us thousands upon thousands of miles removed from these disasters, the two biggest things we are advised to do is to make immense du’a and to donate of our wealth and our time as directed by charity organizations and NGOs (non-governmental organizations) who are on the ground and can best assess the situation at hand, the immediate and long term needs, and what we can do to help.

For all of us at Haute Hijab, our hearts and minds have never left the people of Turkey and Syria; we knew that when Ramadan came, we wanted to continue our partnership with IRUSA to 

encourage our communities to continue to donate and support earthquake relief efforts

 as they move from the critical immediate stages of disaster relief into more mid-term and long-term projects to help those affected rebuild their lives.

The support needed for Turkey and Syria’s earthquake survivors has not eased as time passes and the hard work of rebuilding lives continues.

I spoke with IRUSA’s CEO Sharif Aly, who recently returned from a field trip to Turkey, to learn more about the situation on the ground now in Turkey. While in Turkey, Br. Sharif visited Gaziantep, Hatay province and Kahramanmaras province. In Hatay, in the city of Antakya, the devastation was immense. “It’s basically been reduced to rubble. If you look at an aerial view, more than 80 percent of the buildings are destroyed. The largest number of deaths took place in Antakya,” he says.

In the month since the earthquakes, the Turkish government has cleaned up a lot of the rubble and opened up the streets in Antakya, Br. Sharif says. However there are hardly any people there because the city is unlivable. “It gives you a bit of an eerie ghost town feeling.”

IRUSA's Sharif Ali shares about the ongoing work in Turkey and how we all can help.

At one of the rubble sites in Antakya, a van came and a man stopped the IRUSA field workers and told them about how before the earthquake, he was complaining to his family, because they were moving to the southern beach city of Antalya, and he didn’t know how to transport all their possessions, Br. Sharif recalls.

, he lost everything, his home was completely destroyed, and he told us that everything he had left he could fit into the van. ‘Now I’m so thankful that I survived and my immediate family survived,’ the man told us. Unfortunately some of his extended family died in the earthquakes. He just drove away after that.”