Hijab is an outward expression of our internal belief that Allah (S) has mandated we cover our bodies for His sake. We cover to serve Allah (S), to nourish our souls, to remind ourselves of His presence, and to be known as visibly Muslim women. I personally wear hijab for all these reasons and more.

There has always been an ease to my hijab journey, and I attribute that to a strong upbringing by my parents. So, who better to reach for this article than my precious mother, Sharon, who shared with me a story that taught her why her hijab meant so much more than she ever thought possible.

My mother was born in the tiny Central American nation of Belize. At the age of 19, she converted to Islam just after my father converted. She loved the religion, but there was one thing that she was not convinced of – wearing hijab. “I told myself ‘I will NEVER wear that!’ In the heat of the Belizean sun, who wants to cover up like that?”

She befriended some sisters in the local mosque, the only one in the country at that time, and they helped her to navigate the decision. A year later, she started wearing it full-time. She proceeded to raise six daughters and imparted to all of us the strength and confidence we have to wear hijab.

When I asked my mother if her hijab defines who she is, she said, “My hijab is a part – a really important part – of my identity, but I am much more than a hijabi. I am a person of substance, an important member of society. I am a good example to my non-Muslim relatives.” Then she began to relay to me a story of the impact her hijab has had particularly on Philippa, my father’s sister.

My Aunt Philippa has always been one of my favorites. When she would visit, there was certainly going to be plenty of belly laughs, loud storytelling and good food to eat. My aunt is not a Muslimah but now considers herself a woman who wears a hijab. My mom told me, “Aunt Philippa calls her head covering a hijab, and I believe she’s come to wear it through the influence of me and my family. She used to ask me to help her shop for hijabs, but now she goes out and buys from the Muslim shops herself.”

As Muslims, many of us see our hijabs as a form of worship and indication to the world that we are Muslim, but there are so many rippling effects of hijab-wearing. My Aunt Philippa may not adhere to the core beliefs of Islam but regardless, she enjoys the many benefits of being a hijabi.

“When you set a good example as a Muslim woman, people see you as more than your hijab, and it can help to make the hijab itself less intimidating. Philippa understands her reasonings for wearing it, and it has nothing to do with commandments from Allah (S), or haadith from the Prophet (saw). She wears it for reasons beyond those rooted in religion. That’s meaningful,” says my mom.

Not only does my Aunt Philippa wear hijab, she defends hijabis when she has seen them being insulted in her presence, and she helps hijabis out when they are in need. She told my mother of an incident when a hijabi woman was being derided in her presence and she was the only one to come to her defense. She also related the story of when a hijabi needed help with her furniture, she rushed to her aid.

She is protective of fellow hijabis, just as I would for another Muslim hijabi. What’s incredible is that she has become a part of our community even without being a Muslim. That’s how we become more than our hijabs, and our hijabs become more than just head coverings – it is a means of connectedness.

Through the example of my mother, hijab has made Muslims more approachable to my non-Muslim family. It’s literally the opposite of what we think is the stereotypical experience. We hear the stories all the time – people will not sit next to us on public transport because of our hijabs, people will not make small talk with us like they do other people because of our hijabs, etc. But for some, the hijab has the opposite effect.

My mom also told me that her own sister and her daughters, none of whom are Muslim, have called out un-Islamic depictions of hijabis in media as unauthentic or contrary to what they know hijab to really is. “When they see women in hijab portrayed on-screen in the wrong way, they can recognize the difference between propaganda and what Muslims really are like,” she says.

“That is an effect of knowing our Muslim family of hijabi women. They know that wearing hijab is not just covering your hair – it’s the way we carry ourselves. We are more than our hijabs because we are whole human beings and cannot be used for someone else’s propaganda. Alhamdulilah, our non-Muslim family can recognize that.”

I was so intrigued by talking with my mother about these matters and hearing her story. My advice to anyone reading this is to talk to your mothers, no matter what walk of life they are on – you’ll be intrigued to know who they are. I was talking to Sharon, the woman, when we interviewed for this article, not Mom or Nana – and that was refreshing.

I asked her for her final thoughts, and she said, “You are more than your hijab because who you are as a person can create an immediate connection to any other human being, regardless of their beliefs. That familiarity can transcend race, ethnicity and religion. Hijab itself is not an impediment to connecting to a fellow human being – rather it is a means of relatability, recognition and connectedness. that can break down any barrier.”